The tradition of a bridal party has evolved over time. Some stories depict bridal parties not only as witnesses to the marriage of their family members or friends, but as guardians chosen to ward off evil spirits. Some fables even speak about groomsmen or bridesmen, as they were previously know, carrying swords and guarding the bride during the wedding ceremony. They served as bodyguards and were entrusted by the groom to protect the bride from evil and wrongdoers.
Today, the bridal party is made up of you and your fiancé’s closest family and friends. They have specific roles and responsibilities leading up to and including your wedding day. Your bridal party can be made up of as many individuals as you like, although a smaller bridal party will be simpler to manage and more cost effective.
Your bridal party will be made up of the following people or groups:
- Maid of honour (unmarried woman) or Matron of honour (married woman) or Man of honour
- Bridesmaids or bride’s attendants
- Best man or best woman
- Groomsmen and groom’s attendants
- Bride’s parents
- Groom’s parents
- Flower girl
- Ring bearer
Most people know exactly who they would like to be part of their bridal party, long before the question of “will you marry me” is asked. If this is you, then perfect. It is best to ask as soon as your engagement has been announced and no later than eight months before your wedding date (should you have this time frame available).
Things to keep in mind before deciding on your bridal party:
- Think twice before asking someone as you cannot take the question back.
- How close are you to this person right now?
- Ask yourself if you will be close to this person in five years time?
- Does this person have the time (e.g., new moms and moms to be, friends that travel often for work)?
- If they will have financial obligations, will being part of your bridal party burden them?
- Is this person organised, punctual and trustworthy?
- Will this person be reliable and emotionally supportive?
- Will they be respectful, polite and courteous when working with others?
- How far away does this family member or friend live from you and your chosen wedding venue?
- Do you and your fiancé agree on the same group and will there be any conflict between people?
Considerations to Make Before Selecting Your Bridal Party:
Give the potential person time to think about your request before they make a decision. It is best to give them a clear outline of what your expectations of them will be before they say yes. It is a big commitment of time, energy and possibly finances. Do not be too demanding on your bridal party, they are there to help you both.
Do not feel obligated to ask family and friends to be bridesmaids or groomsmen if you were involved in a similar way for their wedding. The same goes for siblings of your fiancé. It may seem like a loving gesture but does not always prove to be the best decision for either of you.
Your best friend or siblings are not necessarily the best event planners. If you are planning to ask them to be part of your bridal party, they should also know what your expectations are. Consider adding close friends, who are naturally good at planning. They will enjoy the experience and help you make the most of your special day.
Take into account how much space your wedding ceremony venue has available. If you have opted for a large bridal party but a smaller ceremony venue, then you may have to adjust your ceremony planning and have some bridesmaids and groomsmen seated during the ceremony.
